Laxification: Nature vs. Nurture

Posted on September 1, 2009 by

Categories: Gait, Pop Culture, STX, Style, Uncategorized

LPG is proud to present the second installment of posts from the administrators of 90% of Lax Is In The Flow. With this piece, you will get an in depth view on the nature vs. nurture element of life and lacrosse.

When you take a look at a Gary Gait, or a Joe Walters, do you see them playing tennis? Does John Grant lace up the roller blades and get a game of street hockey in before dinner? Undoubtedly, athletes of that caliber could do reasonably well in any hard gritted alpha male contest, but they chose to play lacrosse. Or did they?

The question I seek to answer is simple, are we born to lax? I’d love to think I’m genetically programmed for turfs and shooting shirts, but it’s a difficult argument to formulate. But let’s persist. Depending on where you are born, you’re experience with the game may vary. For better or worse, if you lax hard you eventually meet chaps from Baltimore, and they tell you how their life began with the doctor rusty gating the umbilical cord in half, just before the father Indian pick-upped the infant into a soft meshed goalie stick. Maybe that’s farfetched, but Baltimore folk stink of lax their entire lives. You’d have to think these junkies are innately drawn to the crease, but that’s taking them at surface value.

There is no question these kids love to lax. The lanyard, K18 cuff links, and Mikey Powell playlist are all dead giveaways, but could you stick them in the middle of Mississippi and watch them blossom in identical fashion. Hardly, they’d be beer showering themselves outside NASCAR events like any other respectable human being living that far south of the Mason-Dixon.

Everyone think back to when they first started slinging the rock. Those were the days where everyone was wearing their leftover soccer cleats and box helmets (which may have been the biggest ant-flow in the history of lacrosse). Even though practice looked like recess at the “special” school the next town over, no one cared because no one knew any better, they were just having a great time learning America’s oldest sport.

Admittedly, lacrosse has come a long way since I started in the 90s, but go coach a 4th grade lacrosse camp and its helmet wheelies as far as the eye can see. But at the same time, we all spot the little man with the D1 gloves who looks like a miniature Paul Rabil, throwing ding dongs while macking it with the blaze time trainer 3 times his age, with his mouth guard in. This is because he got those gloves from an older brother, a brother attuned to the power of flow, ensuring this future all-star a leg up on the rest of his fellow laxers on the field, and subsequently, a girl willing to decline any other a/s/l inquiries.

Ponder this, why do the best high school teams in the country always look so good? If anyone has seen a Brother Rice or Delbarton play, one thing usually comes to mind, damn these kids look good. Is it just by chance that every kid in these schools grew up knowing black cleats should never be paired with white socks, or turfs should be worn recreationally? I don’t think so. Success breeds success, in fact, success at this level breeds Spartan style, weeding out the weak and sending them over the adjacent baseball diamond. The little ones grow up idolizing these Lords of Flow and unconsciously accept the rules of flow. By the time these little groms reach high school, they are well versed in the language of flow, swagging low and ripping high.

Lacrosse players feed off each other, exchanging ideas and pinnys to distinguish laxers from any other athlete, and to visibly separate the best from the mediocre. As your game progresses, lacrosse will become increasingly evident in your everyday routines. Cradling a stick en route to the fridge, wearing a pinny to the cookout, and when you’re ready, your own rolodex of laxtitutes. What does all this mean for you? Well if you’re still a newbie who can’t get over that dreaded case of second bar syndrome, coupled with hair that won’t reach for your ankles; there is still time to fix your gear and your game.

This leads me to humbly conclude, we are all nurtured into the lax addicts we are. We are groomed from the onset to look like a laxer. Our mop top hair is our flag of allegiance; we wave her through the mall, signaling to fellow lax allies that another bro is in the house. We rely on each other to advance the particular culture we are building around our sport. We have surely created some unique, beautifully lethargic, and tremendously influential facets to pass on to today’s up and comers.

Slowly but surely, the lacrosse entrepreneurs of the world have begun providing us with some great casual apparel, letting us flair an even greater lax presence.

-Michael Badolato, 90% of Lax Is In The Flow

Speaking of casual apparel, the 90% of Lax crew will be releasing Flow Gear in the near future. So keep an eye out for that on their facebook page at 90% of Lax is in the Flow.

Posted in: Gait

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  • low2high

    my flow brings all da girls to da yard

  • yezzir

    Hahaha this guy should write a book on FLOW. Good job LPG.

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